The end of the growing darkness

Pic of Kora (a dog I sit for) a few months ago, as she watched the night descend on her Autumn yard. I’m a “seasonal affective disorder” kind of gal so Autumn is always hard for me. The days get noticeably shorter and, here in Utah, things visibly prepare for a harsher reality. It’s all about to get very real. So on Winter Solstice, even in the middle of cold and snow, I celebrate, for the end of the growing darkness giving way to more light each day is like being wakened to a mesmerizingly-slow dawn, where you know the sun will be coming and that the things that you thought were dead will again rise up from the ground to meet you. And my moroseness during Autumn is an appropriate sacrifice in order to honor our beautiful planet. Because there is darkness and death but there will also be cleansing and Spring, for “the darkest day of the year”

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“Walk fearlessly into the house of mourning for grief is just Love squaring up to its oldest enemy.” Press the link to watch Chaplain Kate Braestrup’s video from The Moth “House of Mourning”. I really got this video, and understood it from a deep place.  For there was a time–after my soiree in college studying Native American and world religions and post-my first daughters birth–when I couldn’t see another path in front of me that didn’t lead to me becoming a non-denominational pastor.   So to engage as Ms. Braestrup does with her world from the caring of a larger sphere of knowing is the most comfortable place of experience for me.  And often I feel like a foreign visitor to a new planet when people talk of vacations and cars and hedonistic-esque material things for those to me are


On my way to sit a few days ago, I was on the stretch of 700 East where it curves around and intersects with 900 East. It’s a wide road there–like 8 lanes I think–with a lot going on, stoplights, and turn lanes, cars barreling and others merging, and another stoplight up ahead synced up with the 9th East one, so that if the first light’s green, you don’t even have to think about stopping. You can just sit your ass in your lane and just “f*ck it” on through. And it was late evening, but even through my speed and the curves, I could see something up ahead moving across the road from right to left, and it took me only just a sec to realize it wasn’t just one something: it was three “somethings”, a mama duck and her two babies, crossing this road, with cars easily going 55 to 60, mama in front and babies in back,

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Messy lives and miracles on my birthday

When my mom turned 40, she had an epic meltdown in the upstairs bathroom of our geodesic dome house on Hazel Dell Road, crying and rocking herself in the bathtub while relaying how disappointed she was in her life, and the myriad things she thought she’d have accomplished by that age that she didn’t. We were having a party later that day that people would be driving from all over Northern California to attend so I remember feeling like it was important to bandaid this situation so she could get out of the bathtub, don some clothes, maybe some makeup and come down to her own party. There just seemed little sense in adding THAT disappointment to the mix, and it really felt like her meltdown/“existential crises” was just a little too much to handle from the cold water of an upstairs bathroom on party day. I don’t do epic meltdowns. I don’t do “I’m aging oh my god what

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Climate change deniers: pulling your head out of your butt will also improve the oxygen getting to your brain

  In May, Isle de Jean Charles (Louisiana) residents became the first American climate change “refugees”, resettled in advance of a crisis event with the help of 48 million American tax dollars. Today, due to flooding (an event NOAA predicted years ago would worsen in LA due to climate change), 20,000 Louisiana residents have been rescued from their homes, 10,000 are in shelters, 6 people are dead, cars are left on roadways and buried under water, homes and businesses are destroyed, and taxpayer-funded Federal emergency aid has been granted (an estimate of cost not yet available but is estimated to EXCEED the $1.5 billion for the floods Louisiana had this March). If you want to believe that climate change research isn’t “proven” (in quotes because, in science, NOTHING is really ever “proven”; research either supports or does not support certain hypotheses) or that it isn’t human-caused, that’s fine. Please don’t. But you cannot deny that human behavior–emissions from vehicles, focusing

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