On this day’s sun

Stella this morning looking towards the sun, her position concealing the large open, untreatable tumor on her face that is the reason she is currently in hospice care. Stella’s human is enduring a personal emergency of her own and was called away from her girl but her human uncle is there with her during the … Continue reading On this day’s sun

Ghosting

I don’t know about anybody else but my feelings/senses are telling me that the world is not in a normal place. The word that keeps coming to me over and over is “ghosting,” something I first heard in an episode of Doctor Who in which someone dies but keeps speaking as if she’s alive, which … Continue reading Ghosting

In Flight

Today, I woke at 5:24 a.m. to meditate. I’ve been meditating for 30 years—when I feel called to do so—and this morning I sat on my bed in the predawn—legs crossed, earplugs in—and made an event out of breathing. The last few weeks of 2019 into 2020 have been wild. Sometimes I think events ignite … Continue reading In Flight

Recalibrating

And I didn’t want my face to be puffy—and don’t like to upset the animals—but I was crying as I took this first picture. For various reasons that day, I couldn’t hold back the ocean and—as Killian and Smudge moved about their deck—painted my face with loneliness and afternoon sun. And science says tears carry … Continue reading Recalibrating

Abstracted clarity

Part 1 (2016): That moment when you’re exhausted—on your 17 hour workdays stretching out for weeks—but must run in to buy your catholes their Soulistic at Petco in Sugar House and they open a new register with "I can help the next customer in line over here on 3" and even though you are that … Continue reading Abstracted clarity

Many different leaves

And I’m walking Kora in downtown Salt Lake City, close to the big temple. It’s the last two days I’m sitting for her family because they’re moving to Park City so I am feeling that—saying goodbye to Kora as well as Twix and Breezy—and confronting the dynamic nature of life and the beauty inherent in … Continue reading Many different leaves

“About me”

The site title "Aimless" is a moniker I received from my AP Economics teacher Mr. Rosen at Aptos High School (CA) in front of a class of my peers--who didn't know me except as the shy, new girl whose face turned red when she had to speak—which hit an emotional target that's taken me over … Continue reading “About me”

Sunset on an old self

I’m in my car, sweaty after a day of working hard, surrounded by a bunch of shit like a mobile hoarder—my windshield needing replacement so bad I’m about to ditch the whole circus on the side of the road—and it’s the night I start to reclaim my ankles from the bloat my unhealthy eating (due … Continue reading Sunset on an old self